McDonald's Creates a Viral Marketing Campaign -- Based on Hair Metal

McDonalds has a lot to answer for. On its resume, its produced cows so genetically engineered, they've transcended the definition of "bovine". They have also produced a fatty acid that seems to love reproducing itself in the gluteus maximii — a feat so incredible, millions of burger-chomping women have taken up lowrise jeans and g-strings to further emphasis this accomplishment.

Well, add BurgerCon to the list, a website whose sole purpose is to prove that Eddie Murphy's mom from The Klumps should be in a hair metal band. They do not do that. Instead, it's a loud reminder why those pimple-faced fry guys can never get my order right.

Hey McDonalds, I just want you to know from the bottom of my heart: you really suck.

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Full-Length Version of "Glen or Glenda?"

That's right folks, this is the full version of "Glen or Glenda", one of the worst films of all time. It's not as though the topic itself is not worth filming about. Rather, there's just so much wrong about this.

Bela Lugosi's mad scientist character is utterly out of place in this quasi-documentary. The dialogue is clipped and manic. And what's the point of the bison juxtaposed on the screen for absolutely no reason?

Before all of you start your accolades of sympathy, remember that Ed Wood once gave the advice to "just keep on writing. Even if your story gets worse, you'll get better." In other words, I'm pretty sure Ed Wood knew his film was awful. Sometimes it's the awful things that are worth paying attention to, though.

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