Bizarre Casting Couch Auditions

This is simply one of the funniest parodies I've seen in a while. The demure women being coaxed to do strange acts because it is sexy is too hilarious for me to not share with you.

But seriously, if you want to turn me on, you should do the following things that are mentioned here.

• Sniff some freshly made biscuits
  
• Click on the "Start" menu on Windows XP
  
• Highlight key passages in T.S. Eliot Poems

If you do this, you'll have me rolling on the floor, begging for mercy, ever so hungrily asking for more. And more of this means I want more of you because, as you know, you are absolutely irresistible. Especially when you are brushing your teech.

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Cat and Dog Play a Duet on the Piano

One of the more popular trends on YouTube are animals playing the piano. I will grant this is pretty impressive. However, nothing beats this: two mortal enemies of the animal world decide to set down together and play a piece of winsome music on the piano.

This piece, as you might know, represents the discord of the animal world. When one is an animal, one does not where the future may lay. It is kill or be killed. Hunter versus prey. Being an animal is rife with existential angst and no song better captures this grief than this song here.

So if you will close your eyes, and listen carefully, you will hear the soul immanent in this piece. Enrapture yourself in this wonderful memory. Remember that dogs and cats, even though they may not get along, still find it in themselves to play beautiful music together.

Ugly People Dating Service

To those who don't get it, Ugly People Dating Service is obviously a joke. A good one at that, if you are one to brave the pop-ups. The best profile is that ugly girl known as Pat Buchanan.

AGE: 42

OCCUPATION: Bouncer at a biker bar
(But I also moonlight as a dominatrix.)

ABOUT MYSELF:
I can bench press 250 pounds. After being thrown off the Olympic arm wrestling team, because my urine tested positive for horse steroids, I worked at a carnival for a while and spend a few years in prison for manslaughter.

Ugly People Dating Service » Pat Buchanan

Oh Pat, you're such a card! But don't worry, I am sure you will find a willing man who wants to be dominated by you.

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Surreal Piece of Religious Propaganda Posits Jesus as Heroin Addict

I think the intent of this religious painting is that when you pump heroin in your veins, you are also harming Jesus. I can accept the fact people have good intentions. But there's so much that wrong about this picture.

First of all, it looks like Jesus is in the thrall of a heroin rush. Look at the expression on his face. It looks like he's more into it than the junkie is.

The other thing I notice is that the junkie seems to enjoy getting Jesus high. It almost seems to be a malicious action, like he's saying, "Yeah, Jesus, I'm going to take you to places you don't want to go! And if you try to stop me, I've got this gun in front of me that will make you do as I say!"

Finally, it seems like Jesus and the junkie are sharing the same left arm. It's as though they are very awkward Siamese twins. I am assuming of course, that Jesus only has control over one arm — which is a really bum deal for him.

But, as with most propaganda, the logistics of the situation isn't as important as the "message". Unfortunately, in this case, the message is getting obscured by the impossible logistics and the ambivalent nature of the situation.

I think some of you should provide captions for this.

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Man Eats His Own Head

Okay, that is a bit of a misnomer. For all intents and purposes, though, this is the closest anyone will come towards eating their own head. This guys, at the very least is tasting himself and, from the look on his face, he is clearly enjoying it.

Seriously, hooray YouTube! Not only can self-eaters of heads film and broadcast themselves to the world, but they will also find a ready and willing audience. On YouTube, everyone has a chance to be a star. Even Russians have their time to shine.

Put that in your pipe and smoke it, mainstream media!

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Scott Towels: Against Bathrooms Breeding Bolshevism

Whew! I'm glad Scott Towels cleared that up for me! I was beginning to think that paper towels and Communism had nothing to do with each other. Now I know that cheap bathroom supplies breeds ungratefulness towards our capitalist overlords. Next time someone comes over, I will be sure to make my bathroom inspire an entrepreneurial mindset.

But I do have a question. Do all Bolsheviks have moustaches? And is this to mask their evil smirk? One thing I will know for next time: if I meet a man with a moustache in a bathroom I will kill him on the spot. I wouldn't want him to spread wrongful ideas.

Thanks to Scott Towels for educating me on a topic I knew little about!

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Sorry about Yesterday

My apologies to everyone who was expecting an update yesterday. Unfortunately, my laptop died on me and I had to go get a new one :( That's what I get for owning an old Compaq Armada I guess.

In other personal news, I finally plunked my hard-earned cash down for a Wii. It actually does live up to the hype. Best of all, you can play Flash games with the Wiimote. My only complaint is the my arm is aching from playing Wii Sports for too long.

Anyway, on with the updates!

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Pop Songs Sung by Fred Phelps' Wesboro Baptist Church

There's no way Fred Phelps can be real. These songs are just too funny. This has to be some sort of performance art that has kept up its facade all these years. It's too ridiculous for people to take seriously — no less a bunch of middle-aged choirwomen to take seriously.

But serious these people really are. They sing these songs with no sense of irony. Indeed it is ironic that they use the sounds of sin to preach against "sin". I present to you some choice tunes brought to you by that wonderful source of comedy, Fred Phelps — a master, if there ever was one, of "hamming it up".

• "This Land is Fag Land" (sung to 'This Land is Our Land') (1.75 MB)
  
• "Wicked Land of Sodomites" (sung to 'america the Beautiful') (2.22 MB)
  
• "We Have a Message" (sung to 'Country Roads') (2.39 MB)

My favourite song of the three I've shared with you is "We Have a Message". There's just something about hearing "Stompity-stomp-stomp", "Brokeback Mountain", and "BOOOOOOM!" sung by prim Church ladies.

Many folks wonder what would have happened to Hitler if he was accepted into art school. Well, I am one to wonder what would have happened to Fred Phelps if he made an early career switch into sketch comedy. I'm sure Monty Python would have scored big to have him as a cast member.

Again, after hearing these songs, it's hard for me to believe these guys can be serious. Which is why this really is screwed up.

Via GodHatesAmerica.com

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Dancing Superman and Spiderwoman in a Bollywood Musical

Bollywood is so cool. For years, they have been churning out parodies of Western culture that are both cute and hilarious. And they always do it while singing and dancing.

I swear to God, more people besides Indians got to get into Bollywood movies. There is a goldmine of comedy there. And i don't mean this in a mocking way. Bollywood really does have awesome comedies.

And if the comedies don't do it for you, at least there is dancing and singing.

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"I'm Jewish, Can I Join the Klan?"

I'm in the same boat as this guy. My mother is Jewish, but I don't feel very Jewish at all. In fact, for my whole life, except for a brief spell in an Orthodox yeshiva, I've always identified myself as "White". Funny, for all intents and purposes, I don't think Jews would regard me as Jewish. I am currently a practicing Protestant.

Tell this to the Klu Klux Klan, though. They won't have me as a member even though, if I were to have a child with a "shiksa", he'd be hypothetically allowed to join. No matter how un-Jewish I feel, though, the KKK are here to remind me that I'm still part of that club.

It would be cool if all these extremist organizations were right about the Jews' all-pervading power. Then I wouldn't have to work my crappy job. I'd be a banker manipulating the stock market to make myself more rich but nobody would know that since I am distracting everyone through the power of Hollywood. How awesome would that be if it were to occur?

Maybe not for you guys, but for me.

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CelebriDucks

Hey what is better than your favourite celebrities? Your favourite celebrities as ducks. Well, CelebriDucks has you covered! They have lovingly reproduced James Brown and Bill Clinton as members of the antidae family so you can give them as gifts to your family!

Read this touching testimonial.

How is it that these little gems flew under the radar for so long? Rubber Duckies have come of age with CelebriDucks, limited edition collectibles detailed to look like duckie versions of some of the greatest icons of film, music, history and sports. Included in the vast collection are Betty Boop, Elvis, Dr. Frankenfurter, William Shakespeare, Jesus, Barry Bonds and the beloved characters from the Wizard of Oz. More than just a gimmick, these little critters are amazingly detailed, while still maintaining the charming qualities that make rubber duckies so, well, collectible.

CelebriDucks Home

Better yet, what this means is that you don't need to be content with a mere painting of Jesus and an Elvis coffee table book. Now you can have both of them hang together — as ducks. Afterall, in this great planet where poverty, disease, and hunger still afflict millions of people, it is comforting to know that famous people can be immortalized as ducks.

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Show Your Mom Love with the MaternaCord Reconnection System

Recently, I have become distant with my mother and I've wondered what I could do to re-connect with her. Little did I know that the answer lies with how our relationship began in the first place: with the umbilical cord. It only makes sense to suppose that in order to feel an emotional connection one must also have a physical connection. The MaternaCord, therefore, is the answer.

The snap-on adhesive discs have sold me. I cannot wait to perform yoga with my mother while using the umbilical cord. I also cannot wait till the love flows between us again. My mom, afterall, is the most important person in my life.

An added bonus of the MaternaCord is that one no longer has to worry so much about grocery bills. The MaternaCord allows you to borrow a few nutrients from your mother if need be. It is just that simple.

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Modern Man Eater

Doubtless, you are wondering what is missing in your life. Perhaps you are feeling tired, confused, anxious. Your problem is that there's nothing to inspire you. You lack energy and confidence.

Well, have you ever thought about trying cannibalism to solve your problem?

The Ancients knew. Warriors regularly fed themselves upon the Organs of defeated enemies to steal their Strength and Energy. In Pre-History, Families consumed their freshly Dead Ancestors so that their Wisdom and Essence is Preserved and Carried On within the Family.

Modern Man Eater Home Page

But wait, hasn't society evolved beyond such savagery? Indeed, we have. We are not as messy as before. More than that, though, we also have technology. There is no need to feast upon the entrails of dead flesh. Rather, it is much more discreet to dry and distill human beings into vitamins, minerals, and food additives. This is much more sanitary and allows you to eat with peace of mind.

It also works. Quite a few people testify that since they started eating human beings they have become more dynamic and assertive. Perhaps this is the spice you need to add to your life.

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Dracula -- Soul Music Edition

If ever I need a reminder that music of yesteryear sucks as much as it does today, i need to look no further than "Soul Dracula" — a soulless gimmick that sucks that life out of you. Could they really only come up with two words for the lyrics? This song makes the Pussycat Dolls look like Bob Dylan.

This also proves that monster mash will always be the definitive monster novelty song. Not only does Bobby "Boris" Pickett sound more like Dracula this this bozo, but his lyrics also rhyme. At that, it is also more danceable.

There is music that makes you do violent things. Here would be one such song.

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Cowboy Hard Hat

As you realize, there's not a whole lot of variety or fashion in the world of hard hats. They are all the same shape, usually the same colour. This has to change.

This new stylish American classic cowboy hard hat will encourage workers to wear their hard hat even when they don't need to. The durable outer shell is constructed of high density polyethylene that resists penetration, deflects blows to the head from falling objects, reduces danger from exposure to low and high voltage electrical conductors, is slow burning and water resistant.

Vulcan Cowboy Hard Hat - Regular Suspension

Yes, but most importantly, it is a cowboy hat. Now the average construction worker can accessorize himself — without compromsing his safety. It will cow well with his pick-up truck. Or, if he's really intent on keeping up with the theme, he could ride his horse to work.

My friend Brian would love this.

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Colombian Donkey Love

As absurd as the above investigative report is, it gets even more absurd than that. As if sex with donkeys wasn't enough, there is a "Festival del Burro" (Donkey Festival) in the town of San Antero that celebrates sex with donkeys. This even includes dressing up the donkeys in tantalizing costumes and dousing them in make-up to make them look more attractive. Don't ask me if it makes them look more appealing.

Also don't ask me how there came to be a tradition of sex with donkeys. It can't be that there are no willing women. I mean, there are always willing women. I'm not even going to attempt to hypothesize this one. Except to say that donkey sex is sick.

Via Prose Before Hos

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Popeye Arms

Apparently, the new cool thing amongst body builders is to create Popeye arms. That is to say, arms that are potentially bigger than their legs. To anyone who is not hoping to turn themselves into a cartoon, this is gross, unattractive, and tragically wrong.

The culprit of these Popeye arms is synthol, a mixture of oils that are injected between the muscle fibres. The effect is purely cosmetic. One's muscles do not improve in strength. Beyond that, though, synthol is potentially fatal to one's health as injection into a major blood vessel can cause embolism. Since the only benefit is in looking like Popeye, it is hard for me to see the benefit.

As for what directly causes this Popeye effect, as gravity does its part, tissues become inflamed. The blood vessels tighten, and the nerves cramp from getting squashed. All told, one is merely guaranteeing deformity through synthol's use.

It's hard for me to believe people would undergo such risk, but as you can see in the picture above, it happens.

Army of God's Website Gives a Glimpse into Their Twisted Logic

The Army of God's claim to fame is that Paul Jennings Hill — one of their leaders — killed an abortion doctor. Ironically, Paul Jennings Hill died via lethal injection — proving once and for all that a suitable punishment for murder is the death penalty. Most anti-abortionists understand the inconsistency of using murder to decry murder and have therefore denounced the Army of God.

If you are curious, though, about what provokes the Army of God to do the things they do, check out their their website. Here you will discover wall-to-wall Bible verses, dozens of pictures of aborted babies, and hellfire GIFs — all accented by orange and yellow fonts on a black background.

And what have I learned through my tour through this website? That the easiest way to make a profound statement is through repetition, repetition, repetition. When all else fails, use a slogan. Then marvel at your superior reasoning.

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Agitated Senior

Dennis the Menace should have slipped Thorazine into Mr. Wilson's lemonade. If he did that, though, we'd no longer have an interesting comic. So for the benefit of all, Thorazine thankfully never made it into comic book land.

Thorazine, by the way, has an interesting history. It is considered the penicillin of antipsychotics. At one point, 100 million people were prescribed it and it was responsible for the downsizing of many psychiatric hospitals. It has since fallen out of favour as there are many neuroleptics that have milder side effects.

Still, this ad is amusing since it could be regarded as too ageist to some and too absurd to be taken seriously by others. Perhaps this is a sign that we live in a far more extreme time than the 1950s. Still, I fully intend to blow up this ad and put it in my room.

Via Weirdomatic

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Japanese Nintendo Commercial Featuring a Dancing Link

Sometimes I wish I lived in Japan during the 90s. That way I'd have nostalgia for this commercial. As it is, I cannot help but feel that we here in North America are being deprived of some prime video game material. This would be one such indication.

Let's start with the dancing. Those moves are pure funk and would give Thriller era Michael Jackson a run for his money. Zelda... erm... Link here oozes dancefloor confidence and you know he would school your ass.

The music mixes video game cheese with some thick grooves. I can't get the bass out of my head. As is the case with much foreign fare, I wish there were subtitles in this video as I'm curious about the lyrics. All in all, I give this song an "A+" — it is truly awesome.

One other note: the princess is so hot. I'd rescue her anyday.

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Tattoo Removal by Hand Sander

tattooremovalwithhandheldsander.wmv
(2.43 MB)

There is a time in a man's life when he must realize that other men are much more manly than he'll ever be. This is one of those moments. This guy, for whatever reason, decided to get his tattoo removed by a this Black &Decker hand sander. He doesn't even wince! I don't know why he didn't get laser surgery either. I guess he just thought that a hand sander was faster.

It goes without saying, though, that manliness does not equate with sanity. Testosterone can prevent lucidity. I, for one, would rather be in my right mind than foolhardy. To the next man who attempts to mark his territory, I challenge you to apply a hand sander to your skin. Then while you are doing that, I will be like every other intelligent wuss out there and document your foolishness.

The other matter I'm quite curious about is the tattoo. Was it really that bad? I've seen a couple of terrible tattoos in my time, but was his tattoo so terrible that he'd rather have people look at a giant red sore from thenceforth? All I can muster to say is that it must have been so bad he must have been desperate for its removal. Hence the hand sander.

Via Hanzi Smatter

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Lick My Love Pump

The sign of brilliant comedy is a brief punchline. The setup here is one minute, and it is funny in pieces (especially that part about Mach). The punchline, though, it less than two seconds.

From one of the greatest mockumentaries ever made, this is brilliance incarnate.

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Pirate Peg Legs

The Iron Hook has a collection of undeniably cool peg legs. They are handcrafted of various woods and leathers, and if you want, you can even get Polynesian-style hand carved pegs. From what I can tell, there are three varieties of pegs available: tapered-peg, Captain Ahab, and the willow twist crutch. They even sell fasteners to go with it. What a nice touch!

So if you are a collector fine pirate memorabilia, you'll find a gold mine here. Nothing is as beautiful as hand-carved wood afterall.

Of course, there's more to this then the simple neat factor. It seems half the page about peg legs is encompassed by warnings to customers that they accept no responsibility for any personal injury. Take a look at this snippet.

DESIGNED TO BE WORN AS A COSTUME ACCESSORY ONLY. ATTACHES TO THIGH AND CALF. THESE ARE NOT MEDICAL PROSTHETICS, NOR WILL THEY REPLACE THEM.
Some people prefer to strap their leg back as far as each individuals tolerance will allow. This is your choice, for a more comfortable fit, we recommend only a natural bend. A word of advice, use a crutch (we make them as well if you can't find one to suit you) as seen in many Pirate films, this will lessen the chances of you injuring yourself, but that's your choice.

Pirate Peg Leg

I suspect there is a story behind these repeated warnings to customers. I have a feeling — call it a sneaking suspicion — that someone injured themselves and sought to sue The Iron Hook. Perhaps it was someone who sawed off their leg. Perhaps someone actually sought to use this as a medical prosthetic thinking that it was "cool". Regardless, you can't blitz a webpage with four warnings and in all caps if there was not some intrigue behind it.

My response, of course, it that stupidity has its own sense of imagination. If you can think of a way to dismember yourself, no matter how absurd, someone will do it. Stupidity has its own genius, in a sense.

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The Most Hyperactive YouTube Rebuttal Ever

Meet reymon14, a hyperactive teenage wrestling fan who spends his days creating YouTube videos to mock his internet adversaries. As you can see, he's not a terribly eloquent individual, nor is he comrehensible. What he has, though, is lots and lots of expression.

You know when he gives "Monoxide" the middle finger that he means ever single upturn of it. You know when he laughs it's not because he believes whatever he is saying is funny. He has to laugh because if he didn't he'd probably kill his cat. And when he tells his enemies they are probably "hillbillies from Texas or something", you are fully convinced this is the worst thing to be.

I'm actually worried about his Coca-Cola consumption. Should a boy that hyperactive be consuming that much caffeine? It definitely wouldn't be giving helping his nerves, that's for sure. His parents ought to curb this consumption immediately.

In any sense, he's quite a productive young lad. During the past day, he's created seven videos, six of which are at least ten minutes long. There must be a lot of things he feels he needs to express.

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Man Keeps Sons Captive in House Filled with Maggots and Human Waste

Have you ever read something so absolutely disturbing, it makes wonder how human beings can ever reach new heights of depravity? I know that is somewhat surprising coming from me as much of what I write is devoted to truly shocking things. Every so often, though, you see something that makes you realize that humanity seems to always find new ways of performing evil.

Check out Danny William Dove, pictured above, a truly despicable man if there ever was one. I, for one, am truly glad he was immediately removed from society.

For nearly four years, a South Carolina man held his wife and two sons captive in a house infested with maggots and human waste, authorities said.

The boys slept on a bare mattress as their mother was kept in a drug-induced stupor in a house that was decrepit except for a tidy one-room illegal gambling parlor run by Danny William Dove, police said.

Police found maggots infesting the refrigerator. Human waste and used toilet paper littered the bathroom floor, and the house smelled like a dead animal, according to police photographs and authorities who visited the home after Dove was arrested this week.

Father charged after wife, sons found living in squalor - CNN.com<

There's more to it than that. Both sons are not socialized enough to speak proper English. The only words they can speak clearly are cuss words because that's all they were accustomed to hearing. Suffice it to say, they never had the luxury of interacting with any human beings save their mom and dad.

Who knows what damage this man's performed in these boys' lives. They may quite possibly never adjust as functioning human beings. How will this experience impact their adult lives? I shudder to think of their futures.

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What Happens When Fundamentalists Get Into BDSM?

Pray tell, what shall you do if you are a fundamentalist Christian who is into BDSM? Well, you change the terminology and call it "Christian Domestic Discipline". Thereafter, you declare this as an "enhancement" for your traditional marriage.

As is expected, someone has spent a great deal of time and effort building a website dedicated to Christian Domestic Discipline. The webmaster is Leah Kelley and she declares herself to be virulently anti-feminist. Not only is she proudly submissive, she declares this is God's plan.

A Christian Domestic Discipline marriage is one that is set up according to Biblical standards; that is, the husband is the authority in the household. The wife is submissive to her husband as is fit in the Lord and her husband loves her as himself. He has the ultimate authority in his household, but it is tempered with the knowledge that he must answer to God for his actions and decisions. He has the authority to spank his wife for punishment, but in real CDD marriages this is taken very seriously and usually happens only rarely. CDD is so much more than just spanking. It is the husband loving the wife enough to guide and teach her, and the wife loving the husband enough to follow his leadership. A Christian marriage embodies true romance and a Christian man a true hero.

Christian Domestic Discipline - Loving Wife Spanking in a Christian Marriage - About CDD

In other words, since the spanking is consensual, she is talking about BDSM. I theorize that she is uncomfortable being associated with an "alternative lifestyle" therefore feels the need to couch her relationship in religious terminology and decorate her site with Bibles, roses, and wedding rings. However, once you let the proverbial cat out of the bag, everything comes unloosed. Despite her deep religiosity, much of her website is (at the very least) R-rated.

I mean, she even sells her own BDSM/CDD gear. The picture above is from her set of crotchless pantaloons. She calls the colour "demure white". Clearly, this isn't just a woman who's put a lot of thought into her submissive relationship, she's seeking to profit from it too — and she probably has a clientele.

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The Self Cleaning Litterbox Robot

This litterbox not cleans enough for four — count them — four cats. After each use, the litterbox is sifted through automatically. That means there's no more scooping. Your hands are therefore free of the trauma of kitty litter.

Take a look at how it works.

When the cat enters the globe-shaped litter chamber, a weight-activated sensor detects the presence of the animal. After seven minutes, a clean cycle starts with the slow rotation of the globe in a counter-clockwise direction. The rotation of the globe sifts and separates clumps from the clean clumping litter and deposits all waste in the large-capacity drawer, which can be lined using any standard kitchen garbage bag. The globe then returns to its home position with a clean, level bed of litter ready for the next use. Reliable and safe, the unit works without rakes or wires that could jam, clog, or break. Its simplicity and durable construction ensure long-lasting performance and easy set up--just add litter to the globe and plug it in. Moreover, the unit works with any clumping litter, and its litter chamber can be submerged for easy cleaning. The litter box measures 24 by 22 by 29 inches and carries an 18-month full warranty.

Amazon.com: Litter Robot LRII Automatic Self-Cleaning Litter Box, Beige: Kitchen & Housewares

Another cool feature about this robot is that he resembles R2D2. So if you always thought that Star Wars would be even more awesome if a cat every so often jumped into R2D2's faced and crapped in there, this is your drream product. I always thought kitty litter was the ingredient missing from Star Wars and what automatically made Lord of the Rings a much better series of films.

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Kool-Aid Pickles

Yuck. But apparently baby dills seeped in Kool-Aid is popular in the Mississippi Delta region. I call this an abomination. Unfortunately, it's too late to stop it. The Kool-Aid pickle has claimed the lives of many.

Even Kraft (who owns the trademark on Kool-Aid) is shocked.

Upon learning of the pickles, Bridget MacConnell, a senior manager of corporate affairs at Kraft, recovered, and then pronounced, “We endorse our consumers’ finding innovative ways to use our products.”

A Sweet So Sour: Kool-Aid Dills - New York Times

This is codespeak for, "What have I done? What evil have I helped perform? This monstrosity must stop!"

Alas! It looks like Ms. MacConnell is too late. The Koolickle is soon to be trademarked.

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These Guys Need Girlfriends

This is the most homoerotic thing I've ever seen. It's more homoerotic than 80s era Boy George making out with a groupie in a jacuzzi full of Skittles. The irony is that, for all intents and purposes, these boys were probably trying show the "ladies" their sexual prowess.

One would suppose that when you have a group of five virgin males in one room humping the air, you should not video tape it. Not only did these boys consent to being on tape, they decided to be all "stylish" about it. The tragedy, of course, is that this video has made its way onto YouTube for all to see.

I've said it before, I'll say it again: what gets on the internet stays on the internet. I've done my share of stupid things before but I'm always wise to never tape any of my enactments. Now these boys are in the obvious predicament of some stranger walking up to them and saying, "Hey, aren't you that guy who taped himself humping air and had his friends join him?"

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Japan Continues to Create Video Games to Outrage Feminists

The game is called "Battle Raper 2". If the name is not obscene enough for Western consumption, take a look at the game's description.

The game is a 3D fighter where you are able to knock the female opponent's clothing off through combat. The story line has no relations to the original Battle Raper. In Battle Raper 2 there is no raping in the whole game even though the title may imply that there is. In this Battle Raper you also have the option of editing the clothing and weapons of characters.

Battle Raper 2 - Wikipedia, the free encyclopedia

I don't know how this game has not caused outrage in Japan, but society there must have a totally different attitude to women than we do. Believe me, I'm as much a fan of Japan as the next person, but there has to be an explanation as to why there is even a market for this game. Does the common video game buyer even know what the word "rape" means? If not, did the developers even look at what this word means in an English dictionary?

Hypothetically speaking, if this game ever made it to North American shores, I wonder how Jack Thompson would handle it. He's already thrown hissy fits over much tamer fare. Not that I want this game to have a North American distributor either.

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Woman Body Builder Solves a Rubik's Cube

...And she does it while dancing.

This woman is truly admirable. She is a physical specimen, all right. You can see the hard work she put into her body. But then she shows that she's not all brawn. She's got brains too.

You know, this is the kind of woman I would like to have breakfast with. The conversation could be very interesting. Doubtless, she's probably got a lot of experiences that are worth hearing about.

This is very empowering to me, truth be told. Not only does she exhibit fine human achievement, she does so in an entirely positive way. Women like this should be famous — not Paris Hilton.

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Shoes Made of Wire

I'll grant that it is neat. I'll even say that it is downright cool. But these wire shoes must wreak havoc on the feet. The only motivation to seriously wear these shoes would be masochism.

One would argue that high heels are masochistic already. This brings pain to a whole new level, though. Ouch.

Via Virtual Show Museum

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Check Your Prostate, Get Free Baseball Tickets

The Milwaukee Brewers have hit upon an interesting way to get men to have prostate exams. On May 8, if you showed up at Miller Park, allowed a doctor to look at your rectum, you would have gotten free tickets to a future Milwaukee Brewers game. The exam itself was "free and confidential".

I actually think this is a great idea. Not only did men score free baseball tickets, they potentially saved lives. If the motivation to watch a baseball game results in early detection of prostate cancer, that's good. So points to the Milwaukee Brewers for hitting upon an unorthodox means to get what needs to be done.

Now I wonder what novel approach we can use to get women to do a breast exam?

Via USA Today

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Mickey Mouse Teaches Kids About Islamic Supremacy

I'm sure you can appreciate the irony of using a cartoon character created by the decadent West to teach kids about the supremacy of Islam and Islamic culture. The particular people guilty of this gaffe are Hamas. It's kind of like inviting Fat Albert to a KKK rally to teach kids the importance of segregation.

Another question burning in my mind is: where is the MPAA's lawyers in cases like this? They should send some high-powered attorneys to Palestine pronto! I mean, if one high profile terrorist organization is going to spurn all the is good and right about copyright, we're headed towards a slippery slope. Imagine how many college kids will be inspired to wage terrorism on the US by downloading Ocean's Thirteen onto their computer?

Finally, I think it's best we remember that it's not just Muslims who are guilty of the rampant ransacking of popular culture. Evangelical Christians have made an art of it. All you got to do is think of a popular rock band, walk into a Christian bookstore, and find their holy equivalent. This isn't all that new. It just seems more strange to us since there's a greater sense of irony.

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Man Commits Suicide by Sawing Off His Head

Sheesh. Whatever you say about this man, you cannot accuse him of being undedicated about his own demise. Here are the grim details.

A man cut off his own head with a chainsaw after stabbing his 70-year-old father to death in their apartment in the German city of Cologne, police said.

The body of the offender, 24, was found headless when police raced to the apartment after an emergency call, apparently from the dying father, had been broken off in mid-sentence.

Alf Willwacher, a senior prosecutor, said an electric chainsaw was next to the son's body.

"We do not believe any third party was involved,'' he said.

Neighbours said the father and son had been reclusive since the death of the mother